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The energy of buying & selling {part 1 of 3}

I’ve been thinking a lot about the energetic experiences of buying and selling. 

On Monday I did a photo shoot. It was my first-ever real photo shoot with a professional photographer.

I had reached out to several photographers local to me back in August.

One of them was recommended by a friend. I messaged him on LinkedIn, filled out a contact form on his website AND reached out via another site he was on. (Couldn’t find his email address anywhere.)

He took a few weeks to get back to me, then was noncommittal when I asked about packages. 

Another woman kept telling me how busy she was. That she’d only provide ten final edited photos. (What the what?!) Then she said in an email, “I shoot high and light. What’s your style?”

I had no idea what “high and light” meant, not did I really know what style I was looking for.

Two other people simply never responded.

Then I asked my friend Tammy if she’d recommend the photographer who had recently done a shoot for her. I’d been reluctant to reach out to him at first because he lived an hour away, but it was time.

I texted him, and within 15 minutes he texted back and suggested we get on the phone.

He asked me a few questions – what I did, what I needed photos for, the emotions I wanted to portray. THEN HE LISTENED. Then he asked more questions and HE LISTENED MORE. 

I loved everything about his energy. This was a Thursday evening, and he said, “I’m freelance, you’re freelance – when do you want to do this?”

We scheduled for Monday.

So many of you are so worried about what YOU are going to say during a sales/discovery/consult call. 

If you make LISTENING your primary intention, and you state what you do clearly and unequivocally, and you’re passionate about your work and good at what you do, you will book business without ever having to do a hard “sell.” You won’t have to convince, cajole, enroll, or otherwise trick people into saying yes. You won’t have to emotionally manipulate people or chase sales or do anything that feels icky.

They will just want to hire you. (They may even go out of their way – i.e. drive an hour – because they want to work with you so much.)

If you’re having trouble selling, run through your typical sales process mentally. 

What feels out of alignment?

What parts feel high-energy?

What parts feel low-energy?

Stop whatever feels out of alignment (no matter what your business coach/teacher/role model says). Plug the energy leaks that are creating the low energy, and do whatever you can to amplify the high energy. (This doesn’t mean you’re Suzy Creamcheese on the phone – you can be low-key and still aligned with powerful energy.)

Meeting Daniel, I felt at ease right away, despite my nerves. He did all the hard work at the shoot, telling me where to stand, look, smile, look away. In other words: he was a consummate professional from start to finish. He wasn’t weird at the selling part and then amazing at the work part. (Some of you are saying that you’re amazing at coaching but terrible at selling – but you are ONE PERSON and how you show up one place is how you show up everywhere.)

Now – I had a completely different (and much less positive) experience with the woman who did my makeup. Tune in next week for that story.

Onward and inward,


P.S. I’m offering something new called The Writing Circle. I’m trying out the first one on Monday morning at 10am EST. Whether you want to make time for a journaling practice, write a blog post or work on a book idea, come join us! Bring yourself, any writing project, and a cup of tea. I’ll kick us off with some inspiration, we’ll set an intention for the time, and then we’ll each work separately on our own projects. Then I’ll close out the hour. Register here. (*Note that the U.S. starts Daylight Saving Time on Sunday – so the time difference may adjust.)

November 1, 2019

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